The Groom Wore Chains – Its Stahl Ave Again

English: The logo of the of Singapore. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Singapore Sling for me-1= (Photo credit: Sheba_Also)

This past Saturday I attended a wonderful cocktail party to celebrate the upcoming nuptials of a couple who will do the actual deed in Singapore on December 21, 2012.  Celebrations by our family for decades, certainly since the 50’s (my memory span) have centered on the the joys of marriage and self congratulatory acclaim on the longevity of said unions – for those able to claim the longevity thing that is.

Now this party was the howdeedoo of welcoming a couple into that hallowed state of union since none of us present could get to Singapore itself, and since we were unable to attend, the host and hostess decided to do a solemn ceremony honoring the young couple.  The performance of said ceremony was a surprise not only for the couple but all the attendees.

Singapore Slings, the signature libation of the evening, complete with other drinks of choice got the party started.  Hors d’oeuvres of every imaginable delicious sort were provided through out the evening and of course the cake – can’t possibly party without cake.

The poor couple must have been asked at least twenty times what a traditional Singapore wedding entailed and finally resorted to saying they would keep us informed each step of the way as it involves a number of ceremonies.  Also in attendance was my world traveling nephew who had spent most of that last two years traveling Africa with his wife who traveled to 347 cities in 30 countries on their own personal mission for Wisdom Exchange TV and here for their Ignite Excellence site.  More on that another post!

Anyway back to the solemn ceremony.  Well it wasn’t too solemn as all mock weddings should shun solemnity.  The bride to be was whisked upstairs to be dressed in style and the groom was given a bow tie and chains for his ankles. (I just need a moment here as Johnny Cash sings…I got stripes around my shoulder I got chains around my feet)…..ahh that’s better.

My  brother dressed all preacher like sporting a carnivore bbq apron, knitted hat and other accoutrements not at all related to marital bestowment read from a book on golf as lessons for marriage.  (He himself being wed for more that 45 years can be considered an expert.)

Aside from side splitting raucous laughter and mighty cheers this event took me back half a century when mock weddings were played out at regular times on Stahl Avenue.

During the second World War my grandparents bought one of those big two story homes with large front, back and upper deck porches.  It was the central meeting point at least each Friday when all the aunts, uncles, cousins and other ne’er do wells congregated for an evening of merriment.  It was the place we each took new dates to meet all and it was the centre for mock weddings.  It became customary that my parents and uncles and aunts had to celebrate the 15th wedding anniversary and the 25th in style.

This meant using curtains, lamp shades, quilts and anything else at hand to dress the bride and groom.  My uncle Dick usually was the minister and my grandfather hauled out his shotgun to oversee events and make sure the groom did not make a run for it.  My more talented cousins danced, sang or played the violin and guitar.

As children watching adults convulsing in laughter and delighting in the jokes we all grew up with what some might consider a rather warped sense of humour.

Saturday past was not special just because of the events, the celebrations, but because for a short time during the ceremony and the cutting of the cake I thought I caught from the corner of my eye other generations long gone now swirling around the room and laughing and cheering.  For just one moment they were all with us.

Related articles

• 10 Wedding Traditions From Around The World (mryoungscholar.com)
• Singapore Still the World’s Easiest Place to Do Business (prweb.com)

My Son My Speech

I am trying so hard not to share every little thing about our own personal Royal Wedding, but here is just one more. I must admit to more sentiment than humor in this one but hope you will give it a look because it is just a tiny look at one man’s life. This is my speech at the Wedding.

My Son
Before R was born we dallied with a number of names looking for just the right moniker. His dad called from the ER one evening to say a little boy had been brought in with red hair and blue eyes and his name was R. Just that easily our baby ..if a boy..had a name.

From birth he brought lightness, joy and an amazing skill with people. Naturally, balanced with that, came stubbornness and tenacity.

R marched to a different drummer with his first steps and to this day he often seems genuinely surprised that the universe actually may have it’s own drummer .

WE, all of us here, have a drummer of some sort to keep our rhythm of life.
R is one of those rare souls that has a whole marching band.

This is the stuff the shakers and the makers of the world are made of. This is the stuff of an incredible man, my son.

So my son, This is you

2 years old….
R don’t run with a stick in your mouth
R don’t run with That stick in your mouth
R get in the car we are going to emerge

3 years old.
Ryan go play Mommy’s doing laundry
“Drink Mommy”
Ryan that is bleach!!
Hello…poison control…this Mrs B
R get in the car we are going to emerge

R it’s okay if you do not eat dinner but you get nothing more til breakfast
“Drink mommy”
Hello poison control..this is Mrs. B. R drank my Lemon Up hair conditioner
R get in the car we are going to emerge

Hello poison control?
Hello Mrs. B what did R take this time.?

His Generous Nature

R was in hospital for a couple of days. Breakfast came the next morning. The little girl in the crib next to him did not get breakfast. R crawled out of crib, into hers and gave her an orange.
A sign of his generosity.
Nurse…”Chris, R gave the little girl next to him an orange..we had to cancel her surgery.”

One snowy Thanksgiving Day R came home for dinner. He was living in Simcoe and was glad for the left overs I sent with him. When I called the next day I asked if he enjoyed the food. He said, “Mom last night I looked outside and saw a homeless man in a doorway so I gave him sandwich and soup,and gave him my blanket. He was asleep so I covered him up put the food beside him.”

People Skills and instilling confidence..
Eunice…you know Chris. I was nervous about letting the boys go canoeing..but R reassured me that he is an expert canoeist.
Me ….Eunice..R has never been in a canoe before

Val…Chris. I don’t let Andrea go out in cars with kids but I always know she is safe with R driving
Me..Val, R does not have a drivers license

Sincerity
R has an amazing group of friends, a band of brothers of substance, talent and great humor. This is one of the rewards that life has brought this man of strong moral fiber.

And then a few years ago came a young woman who first said to me…R makes me laugh!
And over the years I have seen them laugh, work, and struggle and survive and grow.
Last night my son said to me, “Mom I’m sorry it has taken me so many years to marry but I had to wait until she was ready. And if I had to I would have waited forever”

Oh yeah and if I come across my other son’s speech from his wedding I will share it…cross dressing, pyromania all at the age of 2 and a loving heart!

Ten Fav Things For Mama Kat

The Wedding

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Current 10 Favs Include more than one person.

 

1) I love Kilts and Best Brothers – and yes the kilt was worn au naturel as demanded by tradition.

 

Groom Kilt Brother in Tux

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2) I love the women who make my sons happy!  Heidi who has been married to

 

Tom for 9 years and says she could not have had a more perfect husband, and

 

Mary Beth or MB who has just married my son in the Kilt.

 

 

3) I love that both men are good men, well regarded, who love laughter and

 

general silliness and are devoted to their wives.

 

 

4) I loved this wedding that was so laid back that when the minister asked what

 

symbols they brought to signify their love, the bride answered our rings..but

 

they are in the other room.  Yes everyone chuckled and waited while the maid

 

of honor set off to retrieve them.

 

 

5)  I love my exhusband who gave a wonderful speech about his son and even

 

the exe’s wife who to my knowledge had no disparaging remarks to make about

 

me…at least that I heard.

 

 

6) I love my son, the groom, Ryan, who believes in his roots and family and

 

who wore a kilt to honor my mothers family the Jenkins.

 

 

7)  I love my son Thomas for his devotion to his family, his crazy humor, and

 

his wild appreciation of life.

 

 

8)  I love MB’s family who have taken Ryan as one of their own.

 

 

9)  I love my sister Jane who provides more support than she can ever know.

 

And yes the bra..when she saw my perfect dress she said a strapless bra would

 

be perfect.  I do not have one I said.  Yes! you do she said as she whipped

 

her dress off and promptly gave me hers.  Right there.  Right then!

 

 

10)  I love my grandsons..Tom and Heidi’s sons who think I am the coolest

 

grandma in the world..because I tell them so

 

 

And really there has to be one more..sorry Mama Kat I know I am breaking the rules. 

 

11) I love every reader, every one of you who comments on my blog.  You are the best!

 

Mama

Great time at the WEDDING..and

And…

Will catch up on my daily posts…does 3 in one day count? As catch up? The wedding was great..and OMG have so much to tell you..not the least of which was how lovely the MOG – mother of the groom was..c’est moi!

The chef alone was out of this world..and will do a blog just on him with an interview of this incredible man..and it doesn’t hurt that he is totally hot. Okay getting a grip on myself here…What was the funniest thing..what was the best thing..were the kilts au natural…of course…what was the worst thing? What was it like staying in one of Toronto’s oldest hotels?

And what of the directors and producers present? Did I, in the throes of wine dance joie de vivre help or hinder?I cannot wait to find out…oh my….
Chris

Crushing on..and on..and..

Crushing On and on and on and……

A boy you had a crush on..and where is he now?  From Mama Kat weekly challenge.

Well the title says it all pretty much.  I am a crusher.  Falling madly and deeply for ever, or til the end, which ever comes first.  I do believe that earlier crushes stay with us, probably because of the purity of the young.

My very first love was Keith Evans who lived next door.  He was six and I had just turned five.  Of course it was an unrequited love as he had more important issues, like sports, hanging with the guys, being all macho like.  I doubt he was aware of my adulation and I mostly gazed from afar as he was friends with my brothers.  Dark hair, cute face – just perfect- having met my short list of requirements which included proximity.  

I was set to start kindergarten that Sept and imagine my surprise when our mothers arranged for him to walk me to school on that first day.  Mom gave him a letter I had to take to the school and he manfully put it in his coat pocket to give to the principal.  Walking beside him I felt like the luckiest girl in the world so I found myself strutting enjoying the fact that I was with a prince.  Of course it was only for the first day.  After that I was on my own.  He returned to the mass of developing testosterone that defined my brother’s world.   But it was a moment.

Then soon after he moved away.  Well just not him, the whole family.

  I missed him about five minutes because a new family moved in, and my attention diverted on a dime to Ronnie Ahrens.  Again it was unnoticed and unrequited. But now hehe I was older so tried to fit into their world, still on the outskirts but started to get involved in their games.  Always the last chosen for baseball teams,…,me not him..probably because I ran from every ball that flew my way… and was made to wait in the ice rink side for hockey. 

I even forced myself to jump off the high diving board, one summer to impress him and scared myself half to death but once up there nothing would make me turn around and crawl down those steps.  I have no idea if he even noticed as I was busy preparing myself to meet my maker. Oh and it was a fine display of a belly flop so I felt the pain much longer than the fear of heights.

There was one god like creature who lived at the end of the street.  His sister was my friend Mary.  First off he would actually talk to me as his straddled his bike…Mr. Cool.  He was blond, blue eyed, lean, athletic and he had the first pair of white bucks in the neighborhood.  For those of you not sure of the immense impact white bucks had you will have to google them and Pat Boone.

Perfection I tell you! Just getting all warm just thinking of..wait for the heavenly music,,,tada….Peter Lang!  Even his name was perfect.  This crush lasted a long long time.

I got up the nerve to ask him to my grade eight Sadie Hawkins dance which he accepted…I think cause his mom made him…and I was so nervous I have no idea what he thought of it, and never will know thank goodness.

The funny thing is that when I was in high school he started asking me out.  A lot.  But I was going steady and having been raised right ..you know, morals and everything, I could not accept.  A few years later he was getting ready to go off teaching and me to nursing when we ran into each other, back on our home street.  I was getting married…he was getting married..but not to each other….sigh!

Within two years both our well thought out marriages failed and we each moved onto other spouses and had families.   I saw him only once after that, in a park, each of us with spouse and children.

And that was the last I saw of him.  I heard he had moved up north some where.  But now and then my mind wanders………and somewhere in the back of that thought, Pat Boone croons and I stand there..this geeky kid..I swoon!

MOG…Fascinators…Detox..Dress..Oh, No Dress..Rehearsal Party

MOG.. Fascinators…Detox…Dresses…oh, no dress..Rehearsal Party
 
My good blogging friend Merrilymarylee@wordpress.com messaged me, surprised somewhat that with eleven days to go to the Real Royal Wedding, I am still blogging merrily away. Well actually she is merrily doing things by virtue of her moniker. I guess that means I am burning…a..bridge ..or two…ss we most likely live up to our names. Or I like to think we do.
 
That got me thinking that perhaps I should do a little checklist to see how ready I am. Something tells me I should look at priorities first. And I would if I could figure out what they are.
 
Oh yes..

Fascinating Fascinator? Not

First – the fascinator issue. The guests of the OTHER Royal family certainly made a statement and it will be interesting to see if anyone dares don dinky headwear. Although judging by some, are you listening Beatrice, not so dinky and not so frivolous. After consulting the MOB ( that’s Mother of the Bride not the real MOB with guns and fedoras), we, the royal Mums will not be so adorned. Instead we shall be resplendent in our God given growing out of follicles, nature’s own. I believe she will visit a salon while this Queen Mum will wear a style nest described as what ever my hair wants so it will be. 
 

Detox Not

Second – Detox. Something that promised to perk me up, cleanse the systems liver and colon. Geez, stopped after four days. Gained four pounds and definitely not perky. Darned probiotics. Now working on getting rid of those effects!
 
Dress – Still haven’t got one but after the cleanse effect have decided to cave on the ‘I will never wear a Spanx’ issue. So will get one of those. Spanks yes. Dress, hopefully!
 
Rehearsal Party – as MOG I host this little soiree. Tried to get a caterer who did not return by calls or emails. The affair is in Toronto and I am not. The MOB, not the Mob with guns and fedoras, the other one came up with a fab idea so is helping.
 
Just have to get train tickets for sis, me and auntie and then looks like I am done
 
Yup, I have lots of time to blog. Come to think of it I guess if it was my wedding would still have time to blog?
 
The only thing left on my list for this Royal Wedding is…to HAVE FUN!
 

My dress Not

DETOX & CLEANSE…WHAT???

DETOX & CLEANSE…WHAT???
 
So, it is fourteen days to my son’s wedding and no I am not ready …yet. But that is of little consequence, as I live my life not ready. I tried to change that a few times. You know the not being ready and stuff but I swear it is part of my genetic makeup. And I have faith that it will work out and it always does.
 
Now I am pretty happy with who I am and how I look. I love my body; the way I move, the way I think, the fact that I do laps most days in the pool, I have energy and I revel in the joy of life. And no I am not particularly attractive nor would I fit anyone’s idea of a perfect weight but that is also of little consequence. I am young, generally only date men years younger as that is where the mutual attraction seems to be, but do not think of myself as age discriminate.
 
That whole thing is not where I used to be in my head, it has grown and developed over the years. Yesterday my sis and I decided to look through the mall to see what kind of suitable dresses might be out there. One sales lady asked what I was looking for and I told her my son’s wedding.
 
Well she directed me to a rack and my response was …Oh no they are all too old looking. I’m only sixty-four. I don’t want old lady dresses! She darn near choked on her chewing gum! But that also is of little consequence. No Heimlich maneuvers were required and no sales ladies were hurt.
 
I decided a little Detox & Cleanse would be in order. Just to perk me up. Though I must confess that I have tried it before and lost interest after a few days. Losing interest in such things is also part of my genetic makeup.
 
I chose natural capsules of some sort: two twice a day for seven days and then one once a day for seven days because that works into my time frame for said miracle. It promises to; reduce belly bloat ( I did not know that is what excess adipose tissue of the abdomen was), reduce body waste build up (I thought nature sort of took care of that in the form of evacuation of..), support colon and digestive system (is that not the same as above?), support the livers natural detoxification process, make you feel lighter and more energized. Gotta say the last two points sold me.
 
So no dress yet. Actually a lot of things not done yet, but by all that is mighty my colon and liver should look great for the wedding!
 
Now I am off to swim and yes to do my taxes, as they are due TODAY!