One Stupid Phone Call
It was a dark and stormy night. Well it wasn’t but I have always wanted to write that.
But it was dark. Oh no it wasn’t, it was daylight. But it WAS a stupid phone call. And I made it.
Usually I do my posts from my iPad because it is convenient and I can do it anywhere, even lying down when gravity gets to be too much. The inconvenient part is that I can’t post pics on my blog from it. I am not sure if it is the iPad or my non techy ways.
My lab top died leaving me with my Jurassic Park era PC. Now wanting to be cool I fired up the beast to do something picturesque. Something with a little creativity to it. But I had no Internet. None. Nada.
I unplugged things and replugged. I jiggled wires. I broke out in a cold sweat that turned out to be a hot flash. They never leave entirely. Did you know that?? Then I repeated all of the above several times. Then I would leave and return again thinking it would magically start up.
It occurred to me a couple of hours later that I could call my Internet provider. Normally I avoid any help lines because most of the time is spent on hold. But guess what! Being a blooming techie I discovered the speaker button so I no longer have to actually hold the phone. Now if I had called them two hours previously I would have been close to speaking to someone by this time.
Finally a pleasant woman asked what the problem was.
I have no Internet.
Before any solution could be given you must first give your account information. I assume they want to be sure you are not negligent in your account, which would explain the lack of internet. I was in good standing.
She asked what color the lights on the thing were.
There are no lights.
Long long pause.
There are no lights.
No there are no lights.
Is your receptacle working?
Of course it’s working.
Well please unplug the cord and plug it into another receptacle.
By now the cold sweat was not a hot flash. It was the hint of possible embarrassment.
I unplug and replug.
Nuts it worked.
Then and only then did it occur to me to check the other things plugged into that power bar. Nothing else worked. The natural assumption was the power bar had died. Do they die? So I got rid of it.
Several hours later I walked past a wall. A wall with a switch I never use. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed the switch was down. It’s always up.
Turns out I remembered brushing against that very wall earlier when I was folding a sheet.
And that is when the full flush of embarrassment hit like a tsunami. Turns out the receptacle worked. The power bar worked. I didn’t. Times like that I really miss having a man in my life. Just so I have someone to blame.
Being a man I’m meant to be good at these kind of things, and I’ve done this at least once, and not just with computers, everything from toasters to TV’s. I think the worst was when I couldn’t figure out why my beans weren’t cooking, only to realise that I had turned the hob under the pot of beans on, but not the cooker!
I have done that one too Kieran. Thanks for the VBA I have just posted the recipients and of course credit to you!
That’s no problem, you deserve it 🙂
You do too! Keep up the good work!
my thingy wasn’t even plugged in when I made the call. How un-computer savvy I felt! makes you wonder how many calls like that do they get a day!!
Hahaha Paulina..those darn thingys..I guess they get a lot..someone said to google it for accounts of calls!
Thanks so much for reading and commenting!
Chris
Oh that is so funny but it has happened to many of us. We make the phone all ready to read the riot act and a simple questions brings a memory shift. Oops y daisy!
You are not alone. Great story and the dinosaur works. 🙂
Eliz
It is nice to know others do it also Eliz! If it weren’t for those moments I might not have anything to write about!
Chris
Hahahahaha that was really funny! Haven’t we all done that? 🙂
That was great, glad I stopped by (from Mama Kat’s)
Hi Alison..it is so nice to meet you and am glad you did stop in! Will head over to your site tonight!
Chris
Been there, done that. Blamed husband, husband denied all knowledge so blamed the dog instead!
And yes, the techies do keep a list of crazy customer problems – google it and I guarantee you will feel much better!
Hahahahaha rolling on the floor here! Maybe I should get a dog…and I’ll name her hubby!
Chris
PROOF POSITIVE!! YOU ARE HUMAN!!!!
Yeah with all my foibles I a really really human..nuts and I so wanted to be a saint! I hope no one else noticed my humaness!
Chris
Lol!!! I was cracking up reading this because I have done stuff like this, although I’m usually calling my husband instead of customer service. It’s always something simple too, haha!
Thanks for stopping by! Have a great weekend!
I know ..usually simple…I suppose if I could figure it out I might be a simpleton??? hmmm maybe not Jackie!!
Chris
This is really funny!!! 🙂
Thanks Arlette..makes me laugh too but not so funny at the time 🙂 Well it was in a weird way!
funny girl. thank u.
Your welcome. Such silliness does make for good stories,
LOL! The last line is my favorite; I always blame my husband if at all possible!
I wonder if I should campaign for one and make that part of the job description? Thanks!
Hahahahahahahahaha!!!!! I so enjoyed that! All of it. Including the reason for needing a man! 🙂
It was fun to write. With my record with men and all things techy it gives me lots of material!
Hahaha, I had a similar situation last week when my Internet wasn’t working. I called the company in horror (Internet is expensive and by God if I was going to pay for something that wasn’t even available!) and the guy calmly told me to unplug and then replug the cord. Bam. Instant Internet. That’s all it took. SIGH!
Thanks for the smile! 🙂
Hahaha you would think that a BIG sign would come with it. Unplug replug. I think they keep it a secret just so they have customer idiot stories to tell.
Hahaha,I nearly choked on my dinner reading this.
See the dangers of the Internet? Stupidity..mine..choking your!..It’s a dangerous world!
Can red heads have blonde moments? Well Joss I guess I proved that one!
oh it is just so wonderful when someone other than me has a colossal blonde moment!!
You had me laughing – so many good lines in there “I fired up the beast to do something picturesque” Bwhahahaha. A blonde moment, maybe? Laughing with you…as I’ve done similar things myself.
I would be happy to take a blonde moment over stupid! Unfortunately I am..ER..was a red head!
Mmmm, yes. And not only do the hot flashes reoccur, but so does the forgetfulness (who am I today? What am I doing? What’s that socket and have I ever seen it before?) and all sorts of other weird stuff.
I saw a keyboard my husband had in his room recently and asked how long he’d had it. Years, he told me.
Hahaha that is funny because a key board is not exactly some small thing! Thanks so much for commenting!
You are hilarious! And sadly, I’ve been in a similar situation so you are definitely not alone!! This sort of thing happens to the best of us! : )
Stopping by from Mama Kats
So glad to have you stop by Leah! Just heading over to your site!
Chris
I dare say I would’ve done something similar. I bit accident prone. Flashback to famous (or is it infamous?) incident of getting my hair caught in manual roll up window.
Oh No! Do you wear your hair short now? Thanks so much for your comment Paulette!
That sounds just like something I would do! Thanks for commenting on my blog!
You are so welcome. I love your site. Gives me something to aspire to!
This is SO something I could say I’ve done…
I know! And if it weren’t for those moments what would we ever laugh at?
Visiting from Mama Kats!
I literally laughed out loud while reading this post. I can relate in soooooooo many ways.
Haha and yes love your site! Now I have a craving for vodka! Thanks so much!
I love this. The few times our internet went out, it was my fault but I got mad at the internet company. Can’t go long without internet tho!
I know. I could give up a lot of things but not that. It’s only happened legitimately once or twice and I found myself feeling lost!