Junking The Post

Junking the Post

I wrote a post earlier today about indecision being the greatest time waster of all.  Then I junked it having judged it as being neither witty nor delightful.  Instead it was kind of whiny and negative about all I have not done, have not achieved, not, not, not.  Then I read a few of your posts and chatted to some folk.  Then I thought about all that and quickly gave myself a good swift kick.  You know the kind that rattles your teeth and shakes up the stagnant gray matter pieces that are supposed to be servicing me with intellect and talent?

I love it when I have wisdom to share and am a little pouty that when I need some it is absent, no doubt hanging around some naturally brighter brain than mine – if in fact wisdom is a brain thing and there is NO way I am getting into that discussion today.

If I were wise I would tell the young man whose life appears to be shit right now that while fecal agitation can be a good thing now and then, to look at every aspect of his life he is complaining about and think long and hard about the positive parts he is forgetting about and focus on those.  I would tell him to imagine for a moment that he lost everything he hates right now.  Everything and everyone that irritates and angers him is gone.  None of it is here anymore.  Is that better?  Don Henley sang, “..an angry man can only get so far until he reconciles the way he thinks things ought to be with the way things are..”

Anger, I believe comes from fear and fear I can understand.  Fear stops me from being my best and following my dreams but having recognized it (the fear) I figure I can still win.  Anger also comes from carrying someone else’s cross and giving others power over you.  You can’t change others only yourself.  You don’t have to take back your power, it was always yours.  You just have to realize that.

Does that mean never be angry, never be fearful?  Of course not, just put it where it belongs.  Just like you should never ever supersize your fries, don’t supersize your fear or anger. Don’t let it be your primary feeling.  Others feel it just by seeing you or hearing you and then they become angry or afraid, or they withdraw from you to protect themselves.  If you live in anger you live alone and angrier than ever.  Anger/fear will destroy your business, friendships, family.

If I were wise I could tell you how to stop, how to get off this negative track but that wisdom is beyond me.  It is something I know, but I do not have the right words to make you feel it.

If I were wise I would tell another young man who has no anger but accepts the shit life deals him that it doesn’t have to be that way.  We are what we think, our thoughts.  Yes unfortunate and downright terrible things happen and we can accept that they do happen but we don’t have to believe that we deserve what we get.  We need to believe that we deserve better and will have better.  The theory is that we get what we believe we deserve or will get.  I can buy into that because I have experienced it firsthand.   I also know that true belief is not easy to get.  It seems easy once you have it but it is like a switch that just goes off and again I do not have the wisdom to tell you how to get it.  All I can do is tell you it does exist.  I can give you books to read, experts to consult, but if you are not ready or willing it will come to nought.

And if you are one of the lucky ones you may even have wisdom.

20 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. eof737
    Jan 08, 2012 @ 03:45:46

    When we stop learning , we die… When we decide we know it all, we die… I hear you… :-)


  2. Chatter Master
    Jan 07, 2012 @ 21:59:35

    Oh Chris this was fantastic. I love what you said. I really appreciated the part about power”

    “You don’t have to take back your power, it was always yours. You just have to realize that.”

    What value there is to that. If only those struggling understood it.

    Fantastic post!


  3. susanthecoach
    Jan 07, 2012 @ 21:33:36

    Great wisdom from one who has really lived it! And that’s what matters. Theories are great but real life experience is priceless.
    I believe anger can be an amazing motivator as can fear. Both tell us that we know we deserve better and give us clues to where we can take action to make things better. I think we should fear them both less and use their power to lift us.


  4. judithhb
    Jan 07, 2012 @ 20:45:57

    Thanks Chris – I don’t think we ever stop learning until the day we die. Good post.


  5. maggsworld
    Jan 07, 2012 @ 20:01:57

    I do believe we are all continuously learning and acquiring wisdom. Wonderful thoughtful reminders :)


  6. ceciliag
    Jan 07, 2012 @ 17:05:57

    Yes. lots of good sense in there, particularly about anger being the other side of fear, I might add that guilt also feeds anger. I often say Fear is your Greatest Enemy! well done chris.. c


  7. Crowing Crone Joss
    Jan 07, 2012 @ 16:59:29

    Hi Chris, here’s the new link for book orders – mailing costs now set at $5.00. (instead of $12 – $16 that printing copy was wanting to charge.)



  8. Kathryn McCullough
    Jan 07, 2012 @ 15:53:10

    You are lucky and very, very wise, my friend.


  9. Linda Cassidy Lewis
    Jan 07, 2012 @ 15:31:52

    Wow! It appears you are wiser than you give yourself credit for. Thank you for this post.


  10. Tori Nelson
    Jan 07, 2012 @ 14:39:12

    You must be eight kinds of lucky, dear! Thoughtful and WISE post :)


  11. The Alternate Economy
    Jan 07, 2012 @ 14:30:37

    Interesting post, considering your comments on my site.

    I will never ask you to trust me blindly. Please, take the time to investigate my message with wisdom and see if my message brings you to trust me through time and critical thinking.


    • Bridgesburning Chris King
      Jan 07, 2012 @ 15:51:43

      I absolutely will take the time to read Tristan. I suspect we think a lot alike and while cautious about anyone asking for money I certainly do not negate your message. I am looking forward to knowing you better.


      • The Alternate Economy
        Jan 07, 2012 @ 15:55:37

        I would never call you unwise for being cautious. Even I know my site looks like a scam. I am trying to bring people to understand me by barring my soul. If you choose not to trust me, I will not hold it against you. But I will be surprised… lol!

  12. giulas41
    Jan 07, 2012 @ 14:16:20

    A lot of great advice and that can only come from a person full of wisdom!!! :)


  13. Crowing Crone Joss
    Jan 07, 2012 @ 14:03:02

    well then, my friend, you are one of the lucky ones!


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